Life is awful.
With every success comes failure. With every smile comes a tear. With every good soul born, another dies.
Issues arise every day. Problem after problem. No matter how good a mood you are in, something is going to break it eventually. And even if you think you've found perfection, you'll soon realise you're far from it. Either that or you're simply blind to the world around you.
Every being is filled with straight out failures. The five pounds you promised yourself you would lose just turned into an extra stone instead. The woman you've been chasing turns a blind eye to you. You're always in misery, shame, doubt. At times you'll be happier then sad, but when we come down to it, there's always something on your mind. A small thorn slowly digging in, deeper and deeper.
Then comes the time where the mallet hits your face. A relative passes away. Your best friend just slept with your girlfriend. Your iPod broke. Your grades were well below what was expected.
Be it small or big, every being handles their problems differently. And some don't handle them well at all. While one is slightly distressed over a relationships end, another will be shedding tears because a nail broke. See where I'm going?
We're all different. Some are weak, some are strong. But no matter how much of a stone your heart is, you will face a day where the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Many of you probably have, and you will most likely all agree that it's ..unpleasant.
And even a few months later, the thorn will still be in your mind. Not as bad as before, but it's still there. When it's gone, something new comes up.
Life is awful. Isn't it?
My personal answer to it would be: Who gives a shit? Why not make it better? Maybe even make it good?
As bad as it is at times, it could always be worse. And want to know a secret? Odds are, it's all your fault.
Every issue, every problem, every solution depends on your mindset. I don't even want to know how many times I've had conversations where the lines "It's just not worth it", "Why even keep living?" and "I've given up" are used.
Where did the "I'll push through this", "It's hard, but think about it, I could've been without a house" and "Whatever, come to the pub for a game of pool?" gone?
I don't know if it's today, or if it's always been like this. But people are remaining too negative.
Cheer up!
Before I go any further I'll explain some backstory of my life. I've not gone through the worst situations in history, but they've sure been unpleasant. From the general teenage relationship problems (Oh they're a pain *shudders*) to the more serious family troubles. My family switched from being a really average happy Swedish family to a.. group of pepople. Family bonds were cut, I was thrown out of my house and I resorted to drinking. Oh and I drank, drank and drank. There was a difference though. I didn't sit at a pub letting floods down my chins, nope. I made sure I had a good time. And if anything, I got some good (and stupid) memories of them days.
Also, something happened in my life which I won't ever get past. I regret it to this day and if I could go back in time and change one thing in my life, it would be that. I committed a mistake that's unforgettable, and yes, its' left a permanent scar.
But what's done is done, all I can do now is respect the memory. Whatever pain it puts me through; is a good thing. After all, it's well deserved on my part.
Again, what's done is done. There is nothing I can do about it anymore, other than keeping the memory until my last days. And that's exactly what I'm going to do. Weeping over the past isn't helping anyone. Even then I realised I needed to focus on the future and the present. While leaving my past behind me. I kept going, and intend to keep doing so.
See where I'm getting?
Despite all the jack, I got comments in the lines of "How the Hell can you still be so happy?". Thing is, I wasn't, not in any way shape or form. But I tried to make the best of the situation.
Guess what happened then? The problems past. Instead of sitting at home bathing in my sorrow I got out and tried to keep going as usual. Hang around friends, head to the gym, some sparring sessions in the boxing club. While yes, I was probably a bit more quiet then usual, I was still able to have a laugh. Albeit forced at first, it quickly turned into a simple good ol' laugh.
I told myself everything would turn fine again. At first my mind didn't give jack ass about what I told 'him', but after time it started to listen. Maybe it could be worse, maybe I'm not the wreck I think I am. Maybe I'm not fubar.
Time passes and guess what happened? I've left all problems behind. While sure, my family is not what it once was, it's slowly rebuilding and now it's looking pretty damn good. I have no problem heading downstairs and having a three hour conversation with my dad about whatever's going on. Be it if a Cold War is coming up or what boxing club I should go to when I move back to Sweden (soonish).
This is something that was more or less illegal in my mind a couple of months ago. Look how it changed? The same person I saw as my enemy reverted back to just being the guy that would get home early from work just so I could get a lift to my boxing club (which is 30 minutes away, that's petrol for you).
But oh, the point of this blog wasn't to tell you about what's been going on in my life, but to tell you to cheer the hell up.
I realise your problems might be very apparent, and very bad. But think about it, shimmering away from reality and only leaving your sorrows behind.. What good does it do?
None at all of course, it makes it worse.
What am I trying to say here?
Always make the best of a situation. If it's good, it'll turn so much better. If it's bad, it might just turn out good in the end.
After all, you're still living. You still got a life ahead of you. Whether you're just starting out and progressing through school or if you're awaiting your last days, don't give up. Even if you're awaiting your last days, why fear it? Wait for it, make the most out of your last days, and finally leave this world a happy man.
I know it's easier sitting here behind a keyboard and writing it, but ah! There's another problem. "You don't understand, no one can".
If no one can, what makes you think that you can? Isn't there a possibility that you're simply making a situation worse than it is? Even if what you thought the love of your life left you, that's not enough to put a rope around the neck. There's plenty of fish in the sea, and even if you can't find one now, what makes you think that you can't be happy without one? I have plenty of friends managing their single lives just fine, why can't you?
Keep looking and you'll find it. The solution to your problems. It will be different for everyone. I don't know what triggered it for me, but I know I found it. I also know that trying to remain positive helped me, a lot.
Everyone faces a time where they need a wake up call, what they need to do is accept it. Don't push away people trying to help you, don't try to not laugh, don't try and make your misery worse. Wake up and keep living. You're not dead yet, are you?
And even if you are on the brink of dying (be it a disease or age), you're still alive. You still got some time left. Make the most of it. But this is really not something I can be saying without being in the position of facing Mr. Grim Reaper, is it?
Well fair enough then, I'll refer you to this guy : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9ya9BXClRw
Think you have a problem? This guy's losing everything. He's a father and a well respected teacher, and he's facing death. Unfair, why does he have to die?
No wait, here's the wrong mindset again. Just listen to the speech, and if you have the time, listen to the whole one. Trust me, it's worth it. I've seen people who "have everything" who're far from as happy then Dr. Randy Pausch.
Why? Because they haven't realised there's so much more to life than they can see in their situation. And that's where you need a smack in the face, a wake up call.
Life is awful. But at the same time, it's bloody good. It's up to you to decide which it's going to be. Want it to be Hell? It will be. Want it to be perfect?
If you try hard enough, it will be.
After all, you aren't dead yet, are you?
